Where am I (really)?

We’ve all heard the expression that if we don’t know where we’re starting from, we can’t get where we want to go.

The problem lies in how specifically we identify our location. Let’s look at an easy example first.

You need to order an Uber. You don’t tell the app you’re in New York City, the driver would never find you. You can’t even say you’re in midtown, or even a specific street. You must identify your exact location. Obvious, right?

Well let’s apply this to other areas of life where we might need a change. I’ll start to help break the ice. (If you’re a new subscriber, we’re gonna get to know each other really well…buckle up!)

I’ve been with my husband for 22 years and we have 3 amazing and very busy kids. If I answer the question, “Where am I?” with regard to our relationship, I’d say we are ‘good but we want it to be great.’

#Fail. Super safe answer. Here’s the truth:

• We have a recurring date night that 95% of the time gets canceled due to kids events.

• We prioritize almost everything else in our life, including mundane BS like home maintenance, before doing something fun together.

• We have 1078 tools in our relationship toolkit (grateful for years of growth together) but we’re often too lazy to use them effectively.

• We know that when we make the time for each other and have regular ‘state of the union’ conversations, we’re more connected (but this too, often gets canceled).

Do you see the difference? Stopping at ‘good’ is much more comfortable but it does not allow me to tell the truth about what’s going on.

Your turn. Bring to mind an area of life that’s not how you want it to be. It could be a small setback, an annoying situation you keep finding yourself in, or something much larger that’s not working for you.

Take a deep breath and answer the question, “Where am I, really?”

Don’t worry, no one is looking. This is between you and yourself and the more honest and specific you are, the more you’ll build a foundation for your strongest bounce back ever.

Go on, take the first step.