Enjoy Every Minute

I have strong memories of being in the grocery store, arms and cart full of kids (3 kids in 4 years, to be exact.). Well-meaning passers-by would say, "You sure have your hands full!” Followed by some version of, “Enjoy every minute, it goes too fast.”

I wanted to knock them out.

Too fast, you say?

I haven’t slept through the night in years.

I don’t have a minute to myself, even in the bathroom.

Dora the Explorer is my only tie to pop culture.

My house is a disaster.

Husband? Who’s he?!

Those early days were all-consuming and as much as I was busy, time also dragged.

Fast-forward a decade.

As my kids left for the first day of school today, first day of high school, middle school and last day of elementary, all I am doing internally is cursing those well-meaning people.

It’s not that I have regrets. I’m proud of the years I took “off” (hahahahahaha) to spend with them. I love that I’ve chosen a career that puts flexibility at the top of the priority list. I’m grateful to work from home so I can both see them off for their day and welcome them home.

It’s more like the feeling I have when I’m approaching the end of an episode of a great show, feeling satisfied yet wanting to know right away what’s going to happen next. Wanting things to speed up and slow down simultaneously.

It’s why my focus this year is on presence.

• I will put my phone down more and give them my full attention.
• I’ll say ‘yes’ to the backyard soccer game when I know I could be working.
• I’ll let them help me cook when they ask instead of insisting I can do it faster myself.
• I’ll approach every conversation with curiosity so I don’t miss being surprised by the people they are becoming.

Time will still fly, I have no doubt.

“Those” people will still be right.

But I’ll be present and grateful for each of the long and fleeting moments.